Posts Tagged ‘dad’

Another classic of the logic of a nearly 3-year-old.

“Daddy my arms sore” why is your arm sore my darling? “Because it’s hurting”

you just can’t argue with that sort of logic

have a great weekend

TTFN

Mr Bunny Chow

These are all plausible reasons why my nearly three-year old might be screaming his lungs out at any given time, this list is not exhaustive and any wants can be swapped for doesn’t want and vis versa.

432858-Baby-And-Toddler-Boys-Crying-Poster-Art-Print

  • He has no yoghurt
  • He wants purple juice
  • He wants monkey yoghurt
  • He doesn’t want purple juice
  • He has the wrong trousers
  • He wants Pirate Scooby Doo
  • He has the wrong top
  • He wants elephant yoghurt
  • Someone’s mentioned a shower
  • Someone’s mentioned the Hoover
  • The dog licked him
  • He’s tired
  • He wants a wirrel yoghurt (squirrel)
  • There’s a cat in his bed
  • He wants his farmer coat
  • The Bug (his little bother) is wearing his clothes
  • He wants his wellie boots
  • He wants Scooby Doo on my phone (you tube)
  • He’s not tired
  • There are car seat monsters
  • He doesn’t want to go to school
  • There are monsters in his room
  • The gate is locked
  • He wants blue juice
  • We’ve attempted to wash his hair
  • He wants medicine
  • He wants Fireman Sam
  • He doesn’t want medicine
  • He wants a plaster
  • Ethan called him a little boy
  • He wants digger juice
  • He doesn’t want Santa
  • He wants to sit on the naughty step
  • He wants Mickey Mouse
  • He wants his Mickey Mouse top
  • He wants Pirates (Jake)
  • He wants a story
  • Sit with me Daddy
  • The Bug hurt him
  • He doesn’t want to get out of bed
  • He wants other one socks
  • He wants ebra yoghurt (Zebra)
  • He wants Baby Scooby Doo (A pup named Scooby Doo)
  • Shhhh!!! The Bug is sleeping
  • He wants a hedgehog yoghurt
  • He wants other one yoghurt
  • He wants to watch Race Cars (Disney Cars)
  • He wants to watch other one race cars with daddy (Formula1)
  • He wants his pillow
  • Don’t want duvet
  • He wants Winnie the Pooh one bed sheets
  • He wants a biscuit
  • He wants to ask Mummy
  • He wants toast
  • He wants other one noonoo on his toast (any type of jam or sauce, started out as Nutella)
  • He wants Scooby Doo pasta
  • He wants his picture taken
  • He doesn’t want to go in the pram
  • He wants a Daddy cuddle
  • He wants a Mummy Cuddle
  • He wants to cuddle That One Bug
  • He wants to ask Nanny (Grandma BC not an actual Nanny)
  • He wants other one Scooby Doo pasta. (pre-cooked in a tin vs normal pasta shapes)
  • He wants red one cheese
  • The Bug has something he wants
  • He doesn’t want presents
  • He doesn’t want a smack bum
  • He wants that one cereal, no not that one cereal other one cereal
  • He wants to sit on his potty
  • He’s itchy
  • He wants to wear sandals in winter
  • I don’t understand what he’s asking for
  • Mummy said no
  • Daddy said no
  • He doesn’t want to go on the slide
  • His bum smells
  • He wants an animal one nappy (diaper)
  • His finger is hurting, why is it hurting? because it’s sore Daddy
  • It’s been snowing
  • He wants Cat-Mouse (Tom and Jerry)
  • The cat took offense to him collapsing on it
  • He has to go home.
  • He wants to sun on.
  • He can’t find his…….
  • He wants fish fingers
  • He wants me to pick him up
  • He wants to stand on The Bug
  • He just wants to
  • He wants the music on
  • He wants Pom Bears (nasty reformed potato snacks)
  • He wants Mouse cheese
  • He wants his Mater toy
  • His balloon popped
  • Don’t want Pooh want Tigger one
  • Because he can
  • Daddy stood on his foot
  • He has to brush his teeth
  • The bath tap is running
  • His food his hot
  • Because there is no point in being two and eleven twelfth’s unless you can be terrible
  • He wants two biscuits
  • He picked his nose too hard
  • He bit himself
  • Daddy cut him while clipping his finger nails
  • He has to go to the doctor
  • It’s morning
  • He’s lost the power of speech and I have to guess

That will have to do for now

TTFN

Mr Bunny Chow

I wasn’t witness to this one personally as Mrs BC drew the short straw last night by virtue of the fact that she didn’t have to work today (using up holiday time to go Christmas shopping)

still when it was reported to me this morning I thought it more than worthy of a post and a virtual medal for Mrs BC and her strength of character in not capitulating to his demands at three in the morning.

When The Monkey boy awoke at 01:30 this morning it was with demands for juice, then at 03:00 his demands were slightly more amusing.

“Want Daddy cuddles” to which the response was “Daddy’s sleeping my Angel” which was followed by the next logical response “Want wake Daddy up Mummy”

As I said Mrs BC is amazing and just put him back to bed, she’s an amazing woman.

TTFN

Mr Bunny Chow

We’ve always been very lucky when it comes to our kids sleeping patterns, by and large they have slept through the night and well into the morning from a very young age with nocturnal disturbances normally only brought about by illness.

I am a good father and not at all like the father in this post by the genius demigod of parenting Amber Dusick

http://crappypictures.com/what-it-is-like-to-not-sleep-at-night-illustrated-with-crappy-pictures/

Whaddya mean you’ve never read her site, go there now, come back here later, I’m pretty boring anyway.

intermission-title-still

Oh good you’re back now as I was saying for the last four nights in a row though our very nearly three-year old Monkey Boy has fought us over going to bed to the point where one of us is forced to sit with him until he eventually falls asleep. This would not be so bad if he didn’t then repeat the process and awaken his younger brother with vast amounts of wailing and sobbing again at two in the morning.

I don’t know if he has picked up on the impending changes in his life or if he’s just over excited about Christmas or simply over tired. I do know though that these late night thrombies are fraying the nerves of both Mrs BC and I.

We’re at a loss as to what to do, threatening him doesn’t work, the naughty step doesn’t work, removing Scooby Doo doesn’t work, smacking him doesn’t work, ignoring him makes him louder and disturbs his brother even more, begging doesn’t work, shouting doesn’t work, crying doesn’t work, cajoling doesn’t work, I’m out of things to try short of putting my pillow over my head and hoping Mrs BC comes up with a solution but even that doesn’t work because it results in acts of violence being meted upon me.

Any tips for a fractious sleep deprived family gratefully accepted.

TTFN

Mr Bunny Chow

I was planning on using these posts purely for comic effect but I have to report on this one and anyway sod it it’s my blog I can do and say what I please.

after last weeks chaos with children’s lurgy induced stay at home dad before I’m supposed to be a stay at home dad the return of the boys to nursery and me to my penultimate Monday in the office was a little rushed this morning and as such I probably didn’t handle or deal with this utterance with as much excitement or deference as I should have done at the time, in fact I think my response to Mrs BC when she pointed it out to me was something along the lines of “that’s nice Dear, but we’re late”. This has weighed rather heavily on my mind all day and I’ve realised that I’m a complete arse and should instead have lavished said child with praise and adoration.

What can I say, I’m a prize arse who’s not much good with mornings, especially mornings when I’m running late.

I hear you cry from the peanut gallery “what was this darn utterance from your progeny?”

I stress again, I’m a total arse, who should be strung up by his short and curlies by the gods of karma.

Todays utterance came from my youngest and was quite simply “Dad”

God I’m a prize arse.

He’s been babbling for some time now and we’ve had plenty of “mamamamama’s” and “dadadadadada’s” but this was quite clearly “Dad”.

I cannot wait until the end of next week when I remove myself from the rat race and can properly dedicate my heart and soul to my dear sweet innocent boys to the extent that they so rightly deserve.

Sometimes we just have to slow down and consider what’s important in life, would it really have mattered if I was two minutes later for work? No not really, I’m the boss anyway and even if my boss who’s not been in today had queried it, what was he going to do, fire me?

Sometimes in life you do things you wouldn’t dream of doing if you thought about them.

I really hate myself today.

What an arse I am.

TTFN

Mr Bunny I’m an Arse Chow