Archive for the ‘Mr Bunny Chow’ Category

Dear friends and family,

for the love of god please don’t do what I just did.

Hope you are all well

TTFN

Rob aka Mr Bunny Chow

Thank-You

Posted: 05/02/2015 in Me, Mr Bunny Chow
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Wow, what can I say after the post I wrote about depression the other day  I’ve received a whole shitload of love and support from my friends all over the world and I just wanted to say a huge big thank you to each and every one of you who has reached out, fist bumped, shared and generally just proved to me that the world is full of lovely people.

I had written and deleted that post or equivalents of it dozens of times over the last year and always been to chicken to share them with the world.

I should have grown a pair earlier because the power of talking has given me such a huge mood high I cannot begin to describe it.

I thought I’d give a few updates while I’m here.

I wrote most of the last post on my phone while waiting for my GP who was over an hour late, when she did see me she prescribed me a new kind of happy pill that upon research and speaking with my pharmacist I have decided not to take for a variety of reasons, one of which is it is likely to make me fatter than I already am and another that it is likely to make me very drowsy especially in the mornings and unsafe to drive when in such a state. With two small kids to get to and from school this just isn’t an option even if it will only happen in the short-term.

I am awaiting a call back from her on Friday so that we can discuss alternatives.

I also have my first appointment with my new councillor on the 12th so we’ll see how that goes.

One or two of you asked me about masks.

I have a few default ones.

  1. I don’t want to deal with my head so I’ll pretend to be happy
  2. Mrs BC or the kids don’t need to deal with my head so I’ll pretend to be happy
  3. The ostrich – bury my head in the sand (this one is particularly ineffective as when you do pull your head out of your rear the lion is probably going to be very close)
  4. You are my friend and I’ve not seen you in a long time so I’ll pretend to be happy
  5. You are on the internet so I can easily pretend to be happy

I am not very good at these masks and can come across as a grumpy miserable old sod. I am quite a grumpy sod and am often happiest when I am allowed to be a miserable old curmudgeon whilst drinking brown beer in my pub.

Ahhh yes my pub, that was one of the other things that people latched on to. It is nothing all that special, I built the bar from a driftwood pallet and have decorated it with a couple of eBay bar stools and other little trinkets that make me feel happy.

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Excuse the crappy cell phone pic

 

Now I don’t spend as much time as I would like in my pub as unfortunately my pub has spiders and spiders are not something that guests in my pub are as keen on as I am. I do occasionally have a blitz and get rid of them but by and large they remain.

They are my friends.

I have also been asked to elaborate on the new dog. She is a Labrador Staffie Cross and adores mud and destroying everything she can. She is badly behaved, seems to forget she is house trained at least a couple of times a week and I am besotted. Everyone else in the home hates her.

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Bunny of course remains as my sweet but extremely dim ever faithful companion.

I am not going to elaborate on my hatred for my Sons headmaster in this very public place because my sons will have to live under his command for at least the next nine years and we’re only six months in to our battle of wills.

Thank you again for being out there.

TTFN

Mr Bunny Chow (aka Rob the Curmudgeon)

Well the amazing news is that I’ve been offered the opportunity to exhibit some of my photography at a local gallery.  Unfortunately there are costs involved in this honour and I need to weigh them up – the obvious costs being printing and framing, but I also need to hire the wall space (the lowest cost being a  6′ x 6′ area of wall) which has a two-week minimum hire charge.

My ego says hire the whole hall, print hundreds of pictures, leave them for six months and you’ll be a millionaire by then.  The reality is more like hire one 6′ x 6′ area for a month to six weeks and print out six strong images.

But how do I decide which pictures? Am I going to sell any of them?  How much will people be willing to spend on them? How much do I spend on framing?

This my dear friends of the blogosphere is where I am seeking your help…..

Please look through the pictures and let me have your comments on any or all of the following:
* which six prints I should go with;
* whether you would have them on your wall;
* how much would you be willing to pay for a framed copy of approx 10″x 8″ inches;
* should I go with a theme, wildlife as a whole/owls/big cats/Brighton etc. etc. etc.?

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Please share this post around your friends – I will be giving away one personalised signed print (of your choice) to whomever writes the most helpful comment (not in the least bit impartial but it’s my competition) wherever in the world you may hail from.

I need to make some decisions in the next fortnight so that’s how long I’ll keep the initial run open for. Don’t forget to mention which print number you’d like as your prize.

Please feel to leave your comments below or you can go through the Facebook page or email them directly to rantingmrbunnychow@gmail.com

You see I am agonising over every aspect – I need your help!

Take care and thank you in advance

TTFN

Mr Bunny Chow

P.S. I reserve the right to ignore all advice and take more pretty pictures between now and when the exhibition happens.

I’m sure I’ve written before about the genius who is Amber of http://www.crappypictures.com her insightful and hilarious posts are well worth following whether you are a parent or not, but today she has published the post I’m re-blogging wholesale below, I’m sure that every parent of toddlers can relate.

P.S. she’s got a book coming out, go and buy it from amazon

Enjoy

TTFN

Mr Bunny Chow

(Attention: If this is the first post of mine you’ve ever read you might think I’m one of those bitter parents who don’t seem to like their kids very much. You might even be inspired to say nasty and judgmental things in the comments. Dude. Get a grip. The rest of this blog isn’t like this. Well, not usually. But everyone snaps at some point. This week? I’ve snapped.)  

Jobs.

You know what the best part of having jobs always was for me? Quitting them. Sure, I had a couple jobs I actually liked, the best being an indie video store in college(Bongo Video in Madison, WI – now closed, sadly) but I had plenty of really crappy ones. Glory was found in quitting.

One of my first jobs as a teenager was so horrible and demeaning that I pissed on the uniform* and then returned it in a grocery bag. When I handed the bag over I said, “This job sucks. I quit.”

It was that bad.

So now I’m a parent. People have long compared parenting to having a job. You hear quotes all the time like “the hardest job you’ll ever love” and stuff like that.

Well you know what? Parenting isn’t just hard.

This job sucks. I quit.

Ahhh, there’s the rub. You can’t quit. Ever.

Oh but I daydream about it sometimes. Don’t you?

When I’m at the bottom of the pit of despair (otherwise known as circling the drain)I daydream about quitting. I envision myself walking out the front door, down the front steps and onto the street. From there I hitchhike and somehow wind up backpacking across Spain. There are wildflowers and country villas and all kinds of lovely things. Complete freedom. Alone.

I’ve even gotten so far as to actually walk out that front door. Course I don’t get past the steps. Instead I collapse onto them and cry my eyes out.

Parenting can be brutal.

Endless.

And I try really hard to be a “good” parent. To give my kids attention and respect. But you know what?

Sometimes I just want to tell them to fuck off.

Sometimes, this is what I WANT to say versus what I REALLY say…

 

 

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Oh and those toys that NEVER get picked up? That are covering every surface of my entire house no matter how many times I ask them to pick them up?

Well…

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Sigh. And they still rarely help.

In addition to the “I don’t like you” thing, he also says “Go Away!” all the time.

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And we all know there is nothing worse than a kid who won’t go to sleep.

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The pee denial annoys the crap out of me. (This was age 3-4.5 with Crappy Boy. And currently with Crappy Baby. Yay.)

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And that contradictions thing they do?

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And this happens almost daily…

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He ignores me. Followed immediately by him falling.

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And after all of these things happen in just one day…

Crappy Papa comes home.

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Then I usually hand him something with pee on it.

Some things never change.

 

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*Yes, I really peed on the uniform. True story. It was a gas station. 

And admittedly, sometimes I do say what I want to say. Not perfect. Especially during weeks like this. Haven’t set fire to any toys yet though. Yet.  

2012 in review

Posted: 02/01/2013 in Mr Bunny Chow
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The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2012 annual report for this blog.

Here’s an excerpt:

600 people reached the top of Mt. Everest in 2012. This blog got about 6,200 views in 2012. If every person who reached the top of Mt. Everest viewed this blog, it would have taken 10 years to get that many views.

Click here to see the complete report.

We’ve always been very lucky when it comes to our kids sleeping patterns, by and large they have slept through the night and well into the morning from a very young age with nocturnal disturbances normally only brought about by illness.

I am a good father and not at all like the father in this post by the genius demigod of parenting Amber Dusick

http://crappypictures.com/what-it-is-like-to-not-sleep-at-night-illustrated-with-crappy-pictures/

Whaddya mean you’ve never read her site, go there now, come back here later, I’m pretty boring anyway.

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Oh good you’re back now as I was saying for the last four nights in a row though our very nearly three-year old Monkey Boy has fought us over going to bed to the point where one of us is forced to sit with him until he eventually falls asleep. This would not be so bad if he didn’t then repeat the process and awaken his younger brother with vast amounts of wailing and sobbing again at two in the morning.

I don’t know if he has picked up on the impending changes in his life or if he’s just over excited about Christmas or simply over tired. I do know though that these late night thrombies are fraying the nerves of both Mrs BC and I.

We’re at a loss as to what to do, threatening him doesn’t work, the naughty step doesn’t work, removing Scooby Doo doesn’t work, smacking him doesn’t work, ignoring him makes him louder and disturbs his brother even more, begging doesn’t work, shouting doesn’t work, crying doesn’t work, cajoling doesn’t work, I’m out of things to try short of putting my pillow over my head and hoping Mrs BC comes up with a solution but even that doesn’t work because it results in acts of violence being meted upon me.

Any tips for a fractious sleep deprived family gratefully accepted.

TTFN

Mr Bunny Chow

I was planning on using these posts purely for comic effect but I have to report on this one and anyway sod it it’s my blog I can do and say what I please.

after last weeks chaos with children’s lurgy induced stay at home dad before I’m supposed to be a stay at home dad the return of the boys to nursery and me to my penultimate Monday in the office was a little rushed this morning and as such I probably didn’t handle or deal with this utterance with as much excitement or deference as I should have done at the time, in fact I think my response to Mrs BC when she pointed it out to me was something along the lines of “that’s nice Dear, but we’re late”. This has weighed rather heavily on my mind all day and I’ve realised that I’m a complete arse and should instead have lavished said child with praise and adoration.

What can I say, I’m a prize arse who’s not much good with mornings, especially mornings when I’m running late.

I hear you cry from the peanut gallery “what was this darn utterance from your progeny?”

I stress again, I’m a total arse, who should be strung up by his short and curlies by the gods of karma.

Todays utterance came from my youngest and was quite simply “Dad”

God I’m a prize arse.

He’s been babbling for some time now and we’ve had plenty of “mamamamama’s” and “dadadadadada’s” but this was quite clearly “Dad”.

I cannot wait until the end of next week when I remove myself from the rat race and can properly dedicate my heart and soul to my dear sweet innocent boys to the extent that they so rightly deserve.

Sometimes we just have to slow down and consider what’s important in life, would it really have mattered if I was two minutes later for work? No not really, I’m the boss anyway and even if my boss who’s not been in today had queried it, what was he going to do, fire me?

Sometimes in life you do things you wouldn’t dream of doing if you thought about them.

I really hate myself today.

What an arse I am.

TTFN

Mr Bunny I’m an Arse Chow